Saturday, October 20, 2007

Birth Control for Middle Schoolers? I Think We're Missing the Point

There's been a lot of buzz over the past few days about a middle school in Maine that plans to make birth control available to 11-14 year old students without parental consent or notification. Newspapers and blogs and discussion groups across the country and beyond are debating whether or not middle-schoolers should have access to birth control. The recurrent arguments between the "they're going to do it anyway" crowd and the "giving them birth control only encourages them" crowd are in full swing...and absolutely everybody seems to have missed the point.

My daughter is in the sixth grade. Her middle school can't give her a dose of Motrin when she has a headache unless I run up to the school and not only sign a consent, but provide the medication. They can't let her use her prescribed inhaler with her name and her doctor's name printed on the label unless BOTH her doctor and I sign authorizations. And as much of a hassle as those things sometimes seem like, there's a good reason for all of those checks.

What if, for instance, my daughter was allergic to Motrin? At what age should she be expected to know and take responsibility for that, and to learn all of its alternative forms and names and related drugs, so that she would recognize that she couldn't take Ibuprofin if she'd had an allergic reaction to Motrin? It's my job, at least at this stage of the game, to know those things. It's my job to look out for side effects and allergic reactions, too, and to make sure that prescribing doctors and pharmacists are aware of anything else she might be taking so that we're not mixing drugs that shouldn't be mixed.

If we have to take all of that into account in order to ensure that it's safe to give a kid Tylenol, how do the politics of adolescent sex suddenly make it safe to prescribe them hormone-altering drugs with multiple known side-effects without parental knowledge? What if we have a family history of blood clots or stroke or any of the many things that make hormonal birth control dangerous? Is the average 7th grader conversant enough in that information to provide the prescribing doctor with adequate information? And what if she begins to have symptoms and side effects? Is she ready to be wholly responsible for making her own judgment about when medical follow-up is required? She'd better be, because if there's no parental notification and she chooses not to tell her parents, then no one is going to be keeping an eye on her for those warning signs. If she complains about cramps in her legs, no adult will be able to make the connection and tell her she'd better get in touch with the doctor.

If she's having more headaches than usual...well, then what? Because if a child suddenly starts having serious headaches on a regular basis, you take her to the doctor, right? But what happens when you get there? You're asked...the parent, not the complete a list of current medications. You do it, unwittingly leaving off the most important piece of information. Does the child speak up? We can hope, but she might not understand that there's a probable connection, and if she's gone this far to obtain the prescription and use it without letting you know, odds seem to be against her cheerfully adding it to the medications list in the doctor's office.

And the debate rages on--should adolescents have access to birth control? Are they really having sex at that age? Will they be more likely to have sex if we give them birth control? Isn't birth control at 12 better than pregnancy at 12? Aren't we sending the wrong message if we give them birth control? The soundbites fly, and the real issue never rises to the surface. Like every other parent in America, I have concerns and opinions about all of those issues. But none of them have the first thing to do with this issue.

11-year-old children need their parents involved in their medical care. Period. We need to check their temperatures and give them Ibuprofin when they need it, talk with their doctors, understand how their prescription drugs interact, make sure they drink enough fluids when they have the flu...and we sure as hell need to know when they're taking hormone-altering drugs that can have serious short and long-term side-effects.


J. Lynne said...

I live in the Portland area and am in favor of this program, which is not the first in the country. My understanding is that part of giving parental permission to use the health clinic for the school does involve filling out health history forms, just like you would at a regular doctor office, which would include drug allergies, etc.

Here's a link to a local paper's article that explains the patient care involved, including a thorough upfront evaluation and medical follow ups.

Gerri said...

I think you have hit the nail right on the head here. I also wrote about this recently and share your view that my child's medical needs and treatment are absolutely my business.

RockStories said...

That's better than nothing, JL, but what about having accurate information if a child is treated elsewhere, especially on an emergency basis? What about side effects and complications that a parent won't recognize without accurate information?

Bobbie said...

This is such a complex issue, with many subtexts -- social and religious, in addition to the medical ones. The point you have raised is a valid one indeed, and should figure into the debate. Thanks for bringing this up and setting it forth so well.

MS said...

This is the first I've heard this perspective raised. It makes perfect sense.

So *if* there are valid reasons for middle schools to offer birth control to their students, it would seem a non-drug solution would be the way to go.

This perspective also makes me wonder what reasons one could offer for going behind parent's backs on this issue. The only ones I can think of involve reasons that would disqualify parents from keeping their children in the first place. But maybe I'm missing something.

suchsimplepleasures said...

you made a point with the whole motrin thing. i'm always running to school with tylenol or motrin for my daughter and her headaches. because...they aren't allowed to administer without a consent form from the doctor. my daughter is in 6th grade, too. while i agree that kids are going to do what they are going to do, when we aren't around...i'm going to be the one who takes my daughter to get the pill, if need be! We have a blood clotting condition in our family that can be aggravated by birth control so...if they give it to her, without my knowledge...they might be signing her death sentence.
on the other hand, my husband, an educator...he comes home all the time telling me about 6-12th graders who are walking around pregnant in the school.
but, for my kids...i'm doing the pill giving.

Anonymous said...

According to the local paper, the school will not just give out birth control to a student who asks for it. The parents must sign a consent form for an on-campus doctor who will need all medical information as well.

If it would just be that a child could ask for it, then I could see a major problem. This will turn out to be a good thing in the long run.

clairec23 said...

It's the first time I've heard of this debate. But I presume the children must undergo examinations from a doctor first. Nobody is given the pill without a doctor's consent and I also assume that children's medical histories will be available.

I don't like the idea of it "being behind the parent's backs" but if my child took herself to the doctor and asked for the pill, he isn't at liberty to tell me about it. Either way, I'm out of the loop.

This isn't an issue where I am from so I haven't had to consider it but when my daughter is older I will be putting her on the pill myself. I only wish my mother had put me on the pill (not for protection because I went on the pill as soon as I started having sex) but for the other benefits it brings.

Even if it does become an issue (which I highly doubt), I will be the one taking responsibility for my child, not the school.

Anonymous said...

That reads like an injested chemical contraceptive is the only alternative.

No one's heard of condoms and femidoms?

The "pill" only protects against one risk to unprotected sex - it doesn't do anything at all for STDs, and is probably unsafe for girls under 14.


Anonymous said...

I absolutely agree with you.

This is the exact view that South Park (don't freak out about the fact that this is from South Park, it often has important lessons) episode "Proper Condom Use" conveys.

russ said...

LOL @ southpark reference.

Jeff said...

If you're kids are in public school then you've already lost. The govt decided a long time ago that they own you, and your kids, and they'll do with them as they please.

Get your kids out now!!

Anonymous said...

While the medical side of this debate is a good point, everyone is missing an even bigger problem. Ask your parents if they ever heard of 12 year old girls getting pregnant when they were that age. Ask your grandparents as well if you can. Both will tell you that a 12 year old girl getting pregnant in those times was unheard of, and that if it were, it was due to sexual abuse of a child. The point is that as parents, we let our children become exposed to things that they shouldn't be exposed to. The worst part is that we don't stop it, or even take time to explain it. Our children have grown up in a world of endless sexuality being thrust upon for everything from videogames to tv commercials to music. When are the parents going to grow up and take responsibility for the little one sitting next to them watching some R-rated movie. When will the parents make a point to turn off the music with the explicit lyrics when a 5 year old is present. When will parents take a stand for the innocence of their child?

polydigm said...

All eleven year old girls should be impregnated so that their babies can be harvested for the US army and shipped off to Iraq!

Anonymous said...

I have a son 12 & daughter 13. If they are having sex I would like someone to know and help them, that is if they do not trust me enough to let me know...Planned Parenthood is giving birth control away so why not the school nurse?

Anonymous said...

When I was 12 I knew some 11-14 year olds who were sexually active. I know some kids like that today as well.

In this day and age with all the std's IF they children were educated properly about diseases by their parents and teachers I can guarantee you that the ones who intend to have sex will be able to get their hands on the contraceptives without anyone having to give it to them.

I believe sometimes the few have to suffer for the many. The few girls who get pregnant and drop out of school will hopefully teach a lesson to the ones who remain. And if your daughter is so wild that she's having sex at 13 then actually settling down and trying to learn what it means to be a mother might be just what she needs to keep her out of trouble.

I've known many loose girls who were "lucky" that they didn't get pregnant during their teen years but for various reasons they didn't live long enough to see their 19th birthday. Had they got pregnant and chose to try to be a good mother their lives might have been different. Maybe they would be alive.

Don't group your kids. There will always be a few bad apples. TV and Music put ideas in their head but lack of parental interaction allowed them to make the wrong choices.

Anonymous said...

Sorry for all those weird posts above me. Apparently this post has been submitted to

BrokenCrystal said...

Can't parents just take the responsibility to know what their children are doing and when and where they are doing it? You don't just drop your thirteen year old off at the mall and let them do whatever they want. (especially in my neighborhood) Seriously. Kids do not get to have their own rights until they are of legal age. Until then, they need to be guided in the right direction. They need to be taught responsibility. Parents today are too lazy. You have to be a parent and not a friend to your children. They do not need anymore friends. What they need is a parent. If asked if I (as a parent of four) would rather be liked or feared. I think the answer should be neither. I want to be respected.

Marenda MAGNETIC said...

Birth control for 11 year olds made available by schools just seems like a really bad idea.

Times have changed. When I was in school we didn't even get sex ed until I was maybe 12.

Kids are still developing at this age! Grown women often suffer many side effects from taking birth control pills... this is a bad idea.

Rather than pass out pills, perhaps more focus should be spent on adequate/informative sex and reproductive education.

We are all bombarded with sex all day every day from tv, to movies, to video games, to billboards sexual imagery is every where...but there seems to be very little discussion about all the things that come along with sex, handing pills to kids doesn't seem like the answer.

Parents must step up and be parents how do these kids even have time or a place to have sex to begin with? (lack of supervision piss poor parenting hmmm)

Pre-teen pregnancies may or may not go down, but what happens with sexually transmitted diseases? What about AIDS? What about promiscuity? What about morals/values? What about love? What about emotions? What about commitment? What about relationships? Do they have a pill for that too?

I think that schools should stick to educating not medicating. (are they getting some sort of kickback from the company supplying these pills)

Great blog and great topic!

Best wishes always,
Living Life Abundantly

Anonymous said...

Come on people, this is ridiculous. When I become a parent, I don't want the school to be handing out birth control. And to all of you irresponsible parents out there who are letting 11 and 12 year olds have sex, if you're worried about it, then give them the control yourself. All the school is doing is undermining you and your power as an adult. They want your kids to think they're the heroes, and you're the bad guy. So don't buy into this crap. For those of us who still have some morality left, we'll deal with our kids ourselves. The rest of you, I can only hope you'll look out for your kids too.

Anonymous said...

Umm is a girl on her period at that age in the first place? I have no sisters so it's not like I knew from growing up...

From a chemical standpoint, the pill is just hormones in the body.. Heck their body is still adjusting to puberty by that age...

And then who da heck let's their kid have sex at that age? ok that doesn't sound right cause its not like you say go have sex now you're old enough. But i think parents are leaving sex ed up to the school.. which the school doesn't do a good job of and they turn to their peers to talk about it cause they see them before they come home and get to talk to you..

maybe if jus the parents talk at home about it, i'm guessing at age 10 now? it might just help things?

and yes you will have the few that will still have sex.. but it wouldn't be that much to warrant free birth control to middle schoolers...

ps i can see it now.. in bout 25 years.. birth control to elementary school kids... in bout 50 years.. to kindergarden... yes you get the picture.. put a stop now before its too late!

alpha754293 said...

Why don't parents do what they're supposed to do? PARENT!

Instead of laying the blame on someone else - take some freakin' responsibility for God sakes! You don't want your school to be dishing out birth control, how 'bout you do your part as a parent? Talk about a novel idea!

Anonymous said...

Like most of the so-called news reports of this story, you miss the point that it is MAINE STATE LAW that makes the records private not the school. The school is merely upholding the law and trying to provide comprehensive health care to the students including but not limited to birth control.

RockStories said...

Hard to respond to direct points with all these folks with the same name. User note: You can choose "other" and make up a name--you don't have to divulge your true identity in order to put some kind of identifier on your comment!

To one of the anonymouses above...I'm in my forties, and when I was in middle school in the late seventies there were girls who got pregnant. It was rare and it wasn't sixth graders, but it definitely happened thirty years ago...I suspect it happened earlier than that, too, even if not in the numbers we're seeing today.

clairec23 said...

To the person who asked do children even menstruate at that age. Yes, many do and the age it occurs seems to get younger. Mine started at 11, I wasn't even nearly the first in my class. If I was raped at that age, I could easily have been impregnated. I doubt a rapist would pause for a condom.

The pill doesn't just stop you from becoming pregnant, it can help in certain medical conditions. In my case, if I hadn't gone on the pill (the mild one that doesn't give side effects) when I did, I wouldn't have been able to hold down a job. It was a lifesaver for me. I missed a lot of school because my mother was afraid to put me on it. If she had the guts it would have saved me a lot of suffering. Even now she wishes she did (and she wishes her mother had put her on it too). My daughter will more than likely go through the same thing.

The pill isn't 100% effective, no contraceptive is so obviously sex education is important. Although, that really needs to be improved. I don't know about anyone else but the classes my school gave were complete rubbish.

Most parents don't feel comfortable explaining everything to their children which just leads to confusion. But it is impossible to expect to know everything that is going on in your child's life. I have heard of teenagers having sex at school so it doesn't matter how much you keep an eye on them, if they really want to do it, they will find a way.

Champ said...

I agree with most of the points raised by you. I think parents involvement is must, another issue is to start a program which spread the message for not to go for sex in schools. The kids may be aware about all these.

Anonymous said...

This is a diffucult issue, alike vlood transfusions and mormons. But i'm going to have to argue against you. If a child wanted contraceptives, is it really fair that their parents get the last word? After the baby is born, some parents disown their child. How can you say a parent gets a word in if the child is born, but aren't obliged to take care of it? Not to mention that a child is under the mercy of the parents moral views. If the parent has a differing religion, they have to follow its docterine even at 14 years old, Realize this isn't all medical, although it should be. I think going to a docter not only is the most medically nuetral standpoint, many children wouldnot consult their parents about the pill as well. The pill is much more debated then tylonol

Anonymous said...

If you want everyone except extremists to shut up however stick to rubbers. It has the same medical risk factors of an elastoplast band-aid.

Home Grown said...

I was appalled when I heard what they had done. All the issues involved regarding medical are absolutely valid. However, I believe the strongest and biggest issue that this 'event' highlights has to do with the ever encroaching tentacles of the government; from the UN, to the Feds, to the States to the local county and now, School Board. Intent on micro managing our lives, this intrusiveness is extremely important. The underlining issue as I see it is Parental Authority vs Governmental Authority in the public school. The D.A.R.E. program teaches our children to tell if their parents smoke pot, beginning with assignments of questionairs about who lives in the home, who visits the home, where does everyone sleep..etc... Allowing the child to reveal information that some may think is harmless and results in the child innocently dilluting it's loyalty to it's family. The child doesn't realize that these questions are nobody's business. Narc on your parents is the message while your parents do not need to know that we've prescribed you drugs.(hormones) Sex Ed is another venue of dillution of family loyalty. Instintually the children blush and squirm when sex is discussed or even when folks are kissing on TV. A natural response that is supposed to inhibit sexual expression. Sex Ed helps to facilitiate the dropping of the walls and boundaries by gently replacing these natural inhibitions with increasing the comfortable zone; in the classroom of aquaintances with a teacher who cannot love the child as the parent does. The greying of the boundaries between public and private, between sacred and commonplace, allows for a general acceptance of governmental authority in our lives. The sovereign individual is nurtured through family boundaries and loyalties. A government, be it school, State, Fed or U.N cannot instrude on the sovereigns' rights or lives without consent. And consent is easily had through systematically removing the boundaries of the individual. And this is done most successfully though the children.

How else could a school board believe it has more right to decide what is RIGHT for the children regarding reproductive health? This is not belonging to anyone except the parents of that child.

The Government in NY banned transfat from the restaurants, removing our choice of what we may decide to eat when we go out.

California now tickets people who smoke in their own car, with the professing of caring for the children.

Britain is ticketing people if their children are obese.

All under the guise of government knows best.

We have a Presidential candidate who has stated clearly that her health program will mandate that all individuals will need to be insured. Mandate. And what are the consequences if an individual chooses to take care of their own health care and declines the government insurance program choices? Why is the government to take that responsiblity and choice away from the individual?

This issue in Portland is more than just a health issue.

We need to get angry. We need to step up and stop allowing any form of government from making decisions that rightfully belong to the individual. And it is the individual parents that are soley responsible for their own children that they have brought into the world.

This is a wonderful opportunity for The People to begin taking back our rights. I can thank the school board for highlighting one of the greatest challenges of our times, the redistribution of power from the people to the government.

It is high time that this was put down.

Because if it is not, the alternative is not liberty of the individual, the alternative is an enslaved population. Enslaved by a government that will dictate all that we do.

I have faith in people to do the right thing. And the individual will do a better job at living their own lives than a government can ever do for him/her.

Erika said...

While I do agree with your concerns to some degree, they would be easily solved if the children in question were educated about their own conditions/allergies. I have a strong allergy to Aspirin, for example. Since I was old enough to understand (about 6 years old) I was taught that if anyone offered me any, I was not to take it if it hurt me. I was also to check/ask if there was any present in any different medication I might get. So I lived through childhood unscathed. Like everything that is "wrong" with children these days, its all a matter of parents stepping up and educating them like they used to.

Aygar said...

From the article it sounds like the school doctor it the primary care physician for a large percentage of these children. This is no different then if another child in Maine made an appointment with her primary care physician and requested birth control pills. In either case the parents cannot be notified due to state law.

A child is usually going to go with the path of least resistance to acquire what they want. If a child goes to a school doctor to get birth control pills, I would think that it is because one or more of the parents have made it clear through there actions or words that he/she will not support the child in acquiring birth control. The parent has made a decision/action that will lead the child to hide her actions from her parents. Doing any thing that cause a child to willfully hide there actions is generally a bad idea because the parents are now cut out of the information loop.

Tonks said...

I saw a story about this on the NBC Today Show and found you through Digg. I have boys, but I agree with your assessment.

A big part of the problem is that parents aren't doing their job...teaching about sex and love, monitoring their children, engaging them in conversation, warning them about the pitfalls of early sex, or being a good role model. It's because parents don't do their job that kids get in trouble, and that's what this program was intended to fix--kids basically raising themselves, looking for love and acceptance where their parents have failed.

Unfortunately, it's misguided. If a teacher or school nurse learns of a student engaging in sex, then what's needed is education on disease and its consequences, details of how pregnancy occurs (like how you CAN get pregnant even if he pulls out or you're on your period or you're not even menstruating yet) and what your alternatives are. Those alternatives should not include dispensing pharmaceuticals without a parent's knowledge, even if it prevents a pregnancy, and even if the parents are total idiots or abusers! It's just like the Motrin story. Condoms are an easy, effective choice that won't alter or affect a girl's physiology. Teach a girl how to use it and to demand it! You can't prevent her from having sex, but you can educate her, listen to her, and help her THINK about her choices. Then allow her to make her own decisions.

I'm pro-family, pro-life AND pro-choice, but giving children pharma birth control is not the answer. Ignorance is our greatest is the solution. Prevent the problem by teaching girls AND boys to think about their choices and help them understand the potential consequences.

scarp said...

I agree completely with this post. Plus, have we considered what kinds of effect it will have on their development to take that amount of hormones at that age?

And, similar to the points made about why a parent should be knowledgeable and involved in the dispensing of any medicine - can we discuss the fact that these same young girls who aren't allowed to take an ibuprofen without parental consent can have invasive surgery without consent (i.e. abortions). Kids have parents for a reason, and no child should be making decision of that magnitude without parental involvement.

Brianna said...

I think that no matter what ur age, if u r able 2 become pregnant u should be able 2 get on birth control. I am 13 and 5 months pregnant. If my school would have told me about birth control options, i wouldn't be pregnant. If middleschool and highschool kids are having sex they should eb told about birth control optins... NO MATTER WHAT THE AGE!!!!

Bria said...

And about the parental consent, some kids do not feel comfortable telling there parents about that kind of stuff. As a parent to be i would much rather have my kid on birth control, w/o my knowledge. Then pregnant at a young age. (LIKE ME!!!)

Anonymous said...

I am 12. And let me tell you, middle school sex happens. All of us feel urges, all of you bloggers here probably felt them too in mid school. But, birth control is the COMPLETELY wrong approach. Schools should be handing out condoms, not pills. The kind of 12 year old thats having sex is not a responsible 12 year old, and if you dont give them a condom, its likely they wont use one.

suchsimplepleasures said...

your friend, barb, just sent me the link to this article you wrote. i am, so 100% with you on this! my daughter and i share a condition which predisposes us to blood clotting. birth control pills are out of the question for the both of us. if the school gave my daughter, without my consent, these pills...they might as well try to kill her! forget pregnancies, vd's and the like...oh, i am so fricking opposed to this that it sickens me!
you are so right on!

concerned13 said...

I am completely in favor of this. As a thirteen year old I know that these things are happening all around us. In fact, there was recently a twelve year old girl who became pregnant after having sex with her new boyfriend. She had the baby instead of an abortion because, since its her baby, her parents could do nothing about it. i think that these birth control pills will prevent this.

Brianna said...

there are other forms of birth control, other than the pill. There is the shot and the patch and many other alternates! I think birthcontrol is useful and needed! SEX HAPPENS! Weither people like it or not, kids are becoming sexually active at young ages and they have the right 2 get on birthcontrol! Would you rather have 10 12 yr olds on birth control or 1o pregnant 12 yr olds!?Teens make bad choices sometimes, but they shouldn't have 2 be punished for the rest of there lives with the responsibily of being a teen mother!

Brianna said...

there are other forms of birth control, other than the pill. There is the shot and the patch and many other alternates! I think birthcontrol is useful and needed! SEX HAPPENS! Weither people like it or not, kids are becoming sexually active at young ages and they have the right 2 get on birthcontrol! Would you rather have 10 12 yr olds on birth control or 1o pregnant 12 yr olds!?Teens make bad choices sometimes, but they shouldn't have 2 be punished for the rest of there lives with the responsibily of being a teen mother!

Devon Quinn said...

I myself am a 15 year old girl.

For the person that doesnt know what age some girls start,
my friend started her period when she was 9 years old.

Birth conrtol needs to be given to these young girls! I known so many girls that had sex and got pregnant at 11-12 (and older) but some still haven't been able to get birth control and have had TWO kids. Some girls don't learn their lesson and NEED the birth control so that they don't have any more children, because most that get prgnant dont believe in abortiion and need the prevention before hand.

Shannon said...

Well, I live in the state of Maine right outside of Portland and I am 16 years old. Even though I am not on birth control I am going to be put on it. I think that birth control for younger students is a excellent idea. Many children nowadays are starting their period at age 9 and the students at my school started having intercourse at 11. In my middle school one girl got pregnant 2 different times because the first time she got pregnant it wasn't the "right" sex for her. Children today are having sex more often and at a younger age and some parents do not want to believe that their "angel" is having sex. Parents need to look at the times and realize that even though they didn't dispense birth control when they were in school they need to start doing it now. I know of one girl who has had 7 abortions and on her 7th one her parents were like well "Alex" would you like a horse or an abortion..can you believe that. If she was provided the pill then maybe she would not have to have an abortion. (This happened in middle school.) Today abortions are like birthdays they happen every month at my school and it needs to stop because the old sex ed classes are not enough. We all know the reprecussions, the STD's, and how everything works. What we really need are the tools to prevent the pregnancies are happening and that is birth control and other contraceptives.

BLOGMaster said...

This is an excellent viewpoint that I had not considered and that I haven't seen elsewhere in the debate. I completely agree with you.

I came upon this post through Blog Catalog, btw. My username there is Opinionstreams.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
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Anonymous said...

The author of has written an excellent article. You have made your point and there is not much to argue about. It is like the following universal truth that you can not argue with: No matter how well rehearsed an important speech is, you will forget it two seconds before you need to present it. This is especially true when speaking to the opposite sex. Thanks for the info.

Kate Meredith said...

Besides the fact that these kids may be prevented from having children, the ongoing FDA discoveries of many contraceptive pills are quite scary. The longer one is on birth control, the more at risk they are for the side effects. Are we prepared to have children exposed to these kind of drugs for even more extended periods of time? Lawsuits are everywhere these days and God forbid a 12 year old female starts suffering such side effects, she very well may not understand where it's from or what she can do to stop or gain justice from it. Just my 2 cents.

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